Went for brunch hungover on Sunday morning. Food was ok. Service was so rude I couldn't quite believe it. When not being rude they loitered a long way from all the customers. When you bring us the wrong drinks, it's not our fault. When we order coffee it's nice to supply sugar. When we ask for the bill it's nice to let us pay it without complaining you've had to do basic maths in your head.

So so so bad. It's rare I come out of a restaurant and pray to any deity listening that I don't get food poisoning, but that was the case after eating here. Simply the worst sushi I've ever eaten. The saki was like paint stripper, frankly I only drank it in the hope it would kill anything on the stale bad sushi.

Looking at other reviews of this place I cant help but wonder if I went on a bad night. The service was appalling which was apparently down to staff being absent, but the staff that had showed up seemed to have little clue about bar work, waiting tables or (I discovered) how to cook food.

Waited an age for drinks at the bar. Waited an age to order food which when it eventually showed up was dreadful. Poorly put together and extremely over cooked I wished I'd not bothered.

If I was feeling particularly pretentious (what moi) I'd talk about being there in New Cross and just how hip and cool I was. MEATeasy may be long gone, instead we now have 4? MEAT**** restaurants serving variants on the theme of meat and stuff arranged in delicious combinations. The latest of these is MEATmission in Hoxton, a quite little corner behind the Holiday Inn.

If we considered this small chain to be a family, then Meat Mission would be the art school dropout brother. Living in a squat in Haggerson he wears skinny jeans and a fedora, smokes roll-ups and has a 24 inch waist. He would also probably be angling for a job here....

On a Wednesday night the tables were crowded with the cool young things of Shorditch and Hoxton sitting at booths and benches surrounded by the 'saints and sinners' theme assisted by the atmosphere and features of this former Mission. The haircuts and fashion on display is almost worth the entry alone, but lets talk about the food.

The Dead hippy I've eaten before (see above) and it's fab, the Monkey Fingers were new to me and proved to be an orgasmicly good chicken and chilli/pepper sauce combo - served dumped straight on a metal tray, because anyone eating here is too cool for fripperies like plates.

The Garbage Plate however as suggested by the name, did actually come on a plate. I almost have no words for this combination of a vast pile of fries, meat, gravy, onion, horseradish cream and cheese. It was dirty and I liked it. I pride myself on having a healthy, well trained appetite but this nearly brought me to my knees. Its big, its sloppy and my lord is it good. I ate so much food I could barely breath in, never mind walk. Washed down with a couple of reasonable(if not particularly exciting) cocktails the meal probably shortened my lifespan slightly but I don't really care.

My recommendation, is eat there soon, eat there with friends, eat as much as you can physically fit inside you. You'll never be able to capture the MEATeasy experience but this is probably the closest you can get.